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[Current music: REM - Green;
Bush - The Science of Things]
"Dreams they complicate my
life" My aunt called me this morning to thank
me for the flowers. "How are you doing?" I
asked. "I feel like I've been beaten by a baseball
bat." And she sounded like it. Words with little
moans and gasps in between. She said she was still
groggy from the anesthesia. Nasty stuff, that
anesthesia. She would be on a liquid diet for two weeks,
including her medication which was all in liquid form. She
said the flowers were very beautiful, and added that it was nice to know that someone loved her.
"Of course I love you, silly" I replied. She
laughed. She told me of the delivery of the flowers to
the house. As the delivery man was walking to the door,
my cousin (who is down there taking care of her)
wondered who they were from. My uncle took one look and
said that there was only one person who would send
flowers like those. Me. I paused at this point of the
conversation, confusion coming over me. Was this good or
bad? I told my love of this conversation and she laughed
at me. "You're uncle is right, you're
extravagant." she mused. Again confusion came over
me, like a caveman pondering fire for the first time.
Huh? Waggy? I don't think of it as extravagance, but an
attempt to demonstrate the breadth of my feelings. I
have a hard time putting a price tag on my wishes. "This
is my world, and I am world leader pretend" I
went shopping today with my love. I tend to get grumpy
in this situation, hating the jammed parking lot and
bumping into people. Some days I can be so damn
misanthropic. "You're being Grumblestiltskin"
my love commented. I looked at her from the corner of my
eyes and giggled. She was right.I felt better later
after I brought a new pillow. I was looking at another
pillow until I discovered it was $170. "Whoa! I'm
in the wrong pillow section." I also brought (well,
actually she paid for everything) a sauté pan. Now I
can sear items and stick the seared items in the oven in
the sauté pan to finish cooking the items. Wegis knows
what I'm talking about. "as darkness craves
the mind
we come undone without or pride ...
i need to lose to make it right
i'll confront the stars tonight
i will babble, i will bite ..." I couldn't
watch the eclipse of the moon and watch it turn blood
red because of clouds. Bummer. I suppose it's for the
best, lest a demon take hold of soul and wear my skin
for awhile. Now there's a cool rumor I can start. Har. "there
are days
i fear for my life ..." My mother emailed me
to thank me for the Christmas presents I sent via
Amazon. CDs for bro, video set for Pop, and books for
her. Then she let me know that she already had two out
of the three books. I'm such a dumbass.
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